Kampala: Theories of driving

I made it back from Kampala, but not without developing some theories of driving in the big city. So far i have two theories that are quite over-arching and as long as you follow those you should be fine. I think once I think about it a little longer there will be some others as well. But the main theory that all other theories seem to hang dependently on is "The Theory of Self-Preservation." The majority of drivers out on the road do not want to see their vehicle damaged or themselves killed, therefore they do what they can to not get hit. For example: Say hypothetically you are driving down a two lane road with traffic flowing one lane in each direction. If the vehicle in front of you is going too slow and you want to pass but another car is coming, feel free to pass anyway as the car coming at you will either move over or slow down to avoid getting hit. Now if it's a big truck coming at you, they will not move over because they are big enough to hit you causing minimal damage to themselves. The other car may flash their lights at you, put their blinker on, honk their horn, but when it comes right down to it they will get out of your way. And if by chance you get scared and don't think they will move over you can always move back over into the other vehicle you are trying to pass because they too are looking to preserve themselves and so they will either slow down or move over. This theory also applies if you want to go around a massive pothole that would otherwise swallow you whole. You can go around into on coming traffic and they will generally get out of your way. I say generally because there are a few stubborn people that will drive right up to you and because of the theory of self preservation you will stop. Then you can remain nose to nose for some time until one person decides it's not worth the win and backs up and re-routes. The second theory which works because the theory of self preservation works is "The Theory of the Angle". This basically means as long as you can get the right angle you can cut any one off. For example, if you're at a traffic light that is red. A mob/blob begins building as you wait. Everyone pushes towards the front however they can. If you are on the right side of the blob and want to get the left side you just start inching your way in front of the car next to you. If you can get a sharp enough angle they have to let you in front of them because of the theory of self preservation. One time while stopped at a light I actually saw some one back up just a bit so he could get a better angle to change "lanes" and sure enough once he became more perpendicular to traffic he was able to move over. "The Theory of the Angle" also applies to turning on to a road from another road. it doesn't matter if there is traffic coming down the road you want to turn on to, you just have to find a big enough opening to get your nose in front of one car and the rest is history. even the person wanting to turn into traffic behind you can get in if he follows closely enough behind you and is able to maintain the angle. I've seen more than five cars enter into the road doing this. When the momentum builds it's hard to interrupt. This concludes the presentation of the first two theories of driving in Kampala. A note to the reader: You may or may not try out these theories in America and you may or may not be successful.